Wednesday, June 16, 2010


Maha Vihara ...

I miss going there on sundays :(
I miss Sister Chan and Brother KC :(
I miss my puja sessions :(
I miss performing there :(
I miss having revisions for the MBE exam :(
I miss understanding more and also debating during classes :(

Was so proud at obtaining 2nd place out of the top 3 scores in the MBE exam; I also beamed when I saw my name in the magazine and received the certificate + trophy for it ... But looking back, I've realised that the exam didn't even come close to validating my "holy" status. In fact, there was a correlation between the scores and the moral level that I was at. Negative correlation, that is.

Did I actually stick to my daily five precepts (pañca-sīlāni) ? Atleast I knew I tried last time. Do I try to stick to them today ? Not even an ounce of effort invested ... I have to admit, a little Musavada. Musavada. Musavada. now and then helps me break the everyday-five.

I use to be such a goodie. What happened ? I even missed Wesak this year :(

P.S., I think being cooped-up for 3 days in a row has made me emo-nemo =P I've been awake since 4am and I would respond to that like how Usher did, only in a different context ... "Oh.My.Gosh." Feeling spiritual during the wee hours of dawn. Weird.

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